Hey y’all. Before I begin, I just want to say this to anyone reading this blog entry. The way you view yourself as a person can reflect on the way people see you. If you have low self-esteem, people will be able to tell whether you like it or not. If you’re confident, it shows. Your smile is brighter, your strut is happier, your happiness shines from your soul to the outside world. I’m here to tell you that you’re beautiful no matter what, and the moment you realize it will be the beginning of a whole new you. It doesn’t matter what anyone else says; if you know you are a beautiful person, own it. Remain humble and lift up your fellow brother and sister. You never know what a postive compliment can and will do for someone who needs it. I love you all. And now onto my topic.

I have something to talk to you all about and it deals with the recent news surrounding Countess Vaughn. If you haven’t read about her appearance on the show “The Doctors,” I’ve provided a link for you. Read it first, then come back here. The link is below:

Have you read it? Good. Now, I can freely talk about why this issue bothers me. To start off, I want to say that I feel horrible for Countess. No one understands how devestating it is for a woman to lose her hair, whether it is from lace front glue like Countess, alopecia, stress, medical problems, etc.. We live in a society where a woman is judged from head to toe; we’ve been told our hair is our crown and glory no matter how short or long it is, and to lose it can be life changing, especially if it is a choice YOU didn’t make. But I digress. While I feel terrible for Countess, I am feeling some type of way about this type of publicity. While I do commend this actress for coming out and talking about what happened to her and how she had to go through this to show her little one how to love herself first, I am left wondering how this situation could have been avoided.

The big red flag for me was reading that she allowed this infection to build up around her hairline, ears, and nape for six months before consulting a dermatologist. It disturbed me that the ideal of beauty, in the form of lace fronts in this instance, superseded the basic care of ones own head of hair and the skin. I want to know who applied this lace front to her head for her for these last five years; hell, the last 6 months before she finally decided to go to the doctor. 

Another problem I’m having is where was her trusted hairstylist during this time? Where is the hairstylist that introduced her to these wigs? This is when you need someone trustworthy and firm on your team. I’m speaking out of speculation here, but hair is a serious topic to me and knowing that something like this happened to an actress I grew up watching, it’s heartbreaking. After watching Ms. Vaughn’s interview, the question of “why didn’t someone introduce her to glueless caps” came to my mind. Unless this actress no longer visited her stylist, why wasn’t this brought up in conversation as a safer alternative to gluing down her lace fronts? I personally believe in wearing wigs and weaves for protective styling and/or as an added accessory. I view nothing wrong with wearing weaves or wigs, but I also believe that knowing how to properly take care of your hair, your unit, and knowing the precautions is most important. I know there had to be someone in Ms. Vaughn’s camp to tell her, “Hey girl, listen. Make sure you give your hair and skin a break from this glue. Matter of fact, drop it all together. Why not use wig combs instead and make this a removable unit? That way, your hair and skin underneath this wig can still flourish, but you still have the style you want.” Was there no one there to tell her that? If it was and they didn’t say anything, they carry the blame of this situation too.

It’s not just Countess who I have this problem with. Honestly, it’s not a problem with the women per se, but more of their attitude and mindset. We all have seen Naomi Campbell and the terrible situation her hairline has been in for years. Be honest; you know you’ve made an edge joke about Ms. Campbell. No? Just me? Oh. Ok. I have read that Ms. Campbell is very strong willed and that is proven by her continual use of hair extensions despite her hairline being nearly devoid of all hair and her follicles possibly permanently damaged.

Where do we draw the line? Why is it that we as a people will rather blame an object instead of ourselves when it comes to beauty, weaves/wigs, more specifically? I bet many have looked at a picture of Naomi Campbell and said, “those weaves took her hair out,” but where are the people that have an understanding that poor hair care, as well as a mindset did more damage to her tresses than the weaves did? When are we going to stop deflecting the blame from ourselves and putting this negative emotion toward things we can control? 

I’m sad y’all. I’m angry too. I’m angry because I know that there are people out there that will take Ms. Vaughn’s story and throw it around viciously to those who wear wigs and weaves. “This will be you if you don’t let go of the fake hair and  love yourself because you don’t!” I’ve seen it too many times and have encountered too any people who feel this way. I may be asking for that negative opinion to come here to this post by saying that, but it had to be said to say this: I will continue to advocate wigs and weaves to protect your hair and give you another style option when you’re on your healthy hair journey. But I will most importantly advocate towards taking care of what you’ve been given so that you don’t end up like my example, Countess Vaughn. I know I went hard on her and the people around her, but it’s out of love. I hate that she had to go through this, but not only is it a learning experience for her, but to everyone who has watched or read her story. Godspeed Ms. Vaughn. I’ll be praying for your peace and strong will during this time.

I’m rambling and tired. I could talk for ages about hair, but I don’t want this entry to be super long. Right now, I leave you with my final thoughts:

People, the minute you see ANY type of negative reaction from wig/weave wearing, PLEASE remove it. Too often a person will stick to an option due to convenience, cost, perception, or just plain denial. Let. It. Go. It’s not that serious. Although wearing wigs and weaves can be fun, it should not trump you caring for your real hair and skin underneath. I want you all to research any extension service before getting it done and find alternatives to glue down lace fronts. Thank you for allowing to share my thoughts with you. I love you all. Have a great and blessed day.